Page Title

April 30, 2006
Jerrall-
I am starting to love Sundays. Debbie appears to really like the routine. Debbie
always liked music and on Sunday mornings I turn on her favorite radio station. They
play nothing but the types of songs Debbie used to listen to. We get up every Sunday,
come in the kitchen, and turn on the radio. I fix Debbie’s meds and Debbie has her
breakfast via peg tube and looks out the west window. Sometimes Debbie moves her
right foot to the music. This morning Debbie went to sleep in her wheelchair after a ½
hour. You see Debbie did not sleep all night. Instead of me resisting Debbie I am
starting to go along to what ever the issue was. First we were in no hurry to get to bed
last night. It was 12:30 am when we started and everything was normal. After Debbie
ate and had bed time meds I put all of her braces on and laid down in my bed beside
her. After an hour of Debbie pulling her blankets off and jerking her right fist in a
rotation movement I knew tonight will be different. When Debbie is extra alert at bed
time Debbie expresses herself in a whisper. Debbie says she is ok and is trying to go
to sleep but she can not turn her brain off. Instead of giving Debbie more drugs I take
off all of her braces and get into bed with her. Debbie’s bed is only 3’ wide I have to
lay on my side with her legs over mine. At least this way I can hold onto Debbie and
get short cat naps even if Debbie does not want to sleep and she is not unsupervised.
Debbie kept lifting her head off her pillow 3-4” this is new as if she is trying to get out of
bed. At 5 am Debbie’s hand is not jerking but she still can not sleep so I get in my bed
next to her and hold her right hand and try to get some sleep myself. Every time I
checked on Debbie her pants are dry and she is wide a wake.
Today we can not seem to get out of the kitchen. The radio is playing music from 4 to
5 years ago and if Debbie was not setting in a wheelchair it would seam like old times.
I know I am in denial and cannot turn back the clock but if this music stirs all of my
emotions I wish I knew what Debbie is thinking. It is 3:30 pm and Debbie is still not
tired. I put a dry wash cloth on Debbie’s eyes and she reached up with her right hand
and uncovered her right eye only. Debbie keeps rubbing her forehead some thing is
going on. Five more weeks and we will take Debbie to the outer banks for a week.
Last year Debbie set in a regular chair in the sand instead of her wheelchair I wonder
what this year will be like. I know Debbie is more a where of her surroundings than last
year. One year after her accident and therapy discharged Debbie and toll me Debbie
needed time! I took Debbie to the outer banks three times that year. Thing are so
different now back then I would put a piece of plywood in the sand with her wheelchair
on top and I would carry her to the chair. Debbie would set for hours and listen to the
waves. Debbie was still a sleep at that point of her recovery.

April 27, 2006
Jerrrall-
I can not imagine wakening up and you are blind in one eye. You have no control of
your legs. Your left arm is asleep and you can not move it either. You jump with fear
and wonder what happen to your world. This is what tonight is like for Debbie. As I
kneel by her wheelchair she calms down and puts her right around me and pulls me
tight to her side. I try to tell her it will be ok but Debbie keeps nodding no. All I can do
is be there for her as long as it takes. For now as long as Debbie can touch me she is
calm what is the next step.

Amber-
Mom was calm today. She held my hand and was perfectly still when we watched a TV
show together. This morning mom and I worked on sitting balance and her left hand.
She did well at both. When she moved her left thumb up and down, it was straight. It
is usually bent, this time she kept it out and moved it. OT came at 2 pm and said mom
was so calm she thought she might fall asleep. Susanne and mom worked on cleaning
a mirror. She said this is the best she has ever seen mom use the windex bottle. Mom
was spraying the windex on her own and lifting the bottle up to get the high spots. She
took the paper towel out of Susanne’s hand and gave it back when she asked for it.
Each movement was controlled and smooth. Mom continued to have a good day. I
enjoyed my time with you, mom. I noticed today that mom’s left eye is looking good. I
think changing again back to the liquid drops she tolerates them better. The ointment
works good sometimes and the liquid at other times. We continues as the months go
by to use one for a few months and then change to the other when she needs a
different consistency. The film on her eye seems to be starting to break up or stay
moist longer. She blinks very well as I put the drops in and after. This is fantastic.

April 26, 2006
Jerrall-
Debbie went right to sleep after her shower about 11:30 pm. Suction was only needed
a couple of times. When I changed her at 3:30 am Debbie stayed asleep. This
morning Debbie ate and had her meds in bed and never woke up. Finally at 10 am
Amber got Debbie all stretch out all ready for PT Brian at 11 am. Brian said Debbie
was doing some of the best standing yet. Both of them were sweating and Debbie was
extra tired. I laid Debbie on the black mat to rest and it was 1 ½ hours before Debbie
wanted to get up. We are in the kitchen waiting for Robin, speech. Robin said today
Debbie was working well with her except with eye control. Robin said something about
changing some goals and working with tracking.
Tonight Krystal and I took Debbie to the mall. Krystal asked which belt was best and
Debbie would reach out and touch it and smile. Both of them appeared to be having
fun. When we got home Debbie wanted to lay on the black mat and rest.

April 25, 2006
Jerrall-
This morning was different than other mornings, Debbie did not wake up until 2:15 this
afternoon. Even though we washed her face and changed her depends. Debbie has
not felt herself since Thursday of last week. We have not heard back from primary
care about the urine sample from Saturday. No news is good news but if that is true
then want is wrong with Debbie. I have learned from Robin lately that Debbie needs
more down time so I have been working on Debbie’s web site to past the time because
I have to be around to hear Debbie breath but I can observe with out bothering
Debbie. When I got Debbie up we spent 2 hours in the kitchen. After lunch we did her
mouth, filed her nails, and a treatment to Debbie’s face. We rested on them mat for a
while and now we are outside on the patio. Debbie is extra calm and leaning back
taking in all of the sounds. It is 6:45 pm all most sun down and all the birds are
singing. Debbie I miss you so much and I will never know how much you miss
everything you used to be able to do. But keep trying and never say never and this
will work them self in there own time. Until then you can count on me to protect you
and be there for you until then.
Tonight Debbie appears upset about some thing a lot of excessive jumping. I gave
Debbie edivail and disapam at 9 pm but it is not making a difference. Tomorrow is
therapy hope we get some sleep tonight.

April 24, 2006
Jerrall-
Last night I was so tired after Debbie’s shower she did not want to go to sleep again. I
told Amber I would sleep in the living room floor for a couple of hour and she could lay
in my bed with Debbie. After Debbie went potty she went to sleep. I hope we hear
today from doctor about urine sample from Saturday. Amber changed beds at 2 am.
Debbie had a little more saliva issues than the last couple of nights. This morning
Debbie stayed asleep until she had to get up at 10 am because Brian will be here at
11am.
At 12:30 pm I laid Debbie down on the mat and put a dry wash cloth over eyes so she
could rest. To my surprise Debbie took her right hand and pulled it over her eyes and
mouth. It is 1:30 pm and Debbie has to get up and eat because Robin will be here at 2:
30. I will keep my fingers crossed.
Debbie is setting in kitchen after lunch looking out the west window listening to the
radio. We are waiting for Robin, speech, but what is different? Debbie has taken her
right leg and moved it over the foot rest and is moving her foot to the music. I pulled a
kitchen chair up in front of her and Debbie put her right foot up on the edge of it. All of
this movement and I still can not get Debbie to stick her tongue out.
Robin just left and I laid Debbie down on the black mat. She turned her head to the
left and is looking out the window. Just before Robin left she said Debbie was not on
today and Debbie could not control her eyes or tongue today, so therapy will be short.
I know Robin and I are on the same side but I said Robin Debbie is on, she can do a lot
of things with you but Debbie’s eye and tongue control is her biggest weakness. I put
the pop sickle stick up to Debbie’s lips and Debbie closed her lips on it. Robin is right
there. She said there are things that Debbie can not do today, but what she can do
Debbie does well. Still Robin, why can Debbie not do what she used to. This is a good
question for the doctors in 2 weeks. My mom would come visit 2 years ago and ask
Debbie where is her right ear, mouth, or nose and Debbie would point to them. Why
can nobody tell me what happened. This will be our new quest in 2 weeks. I wonder if
it is water pushing on the brain and needs to be drained. They did a CT scan 6
mouths ago and said everything was ok.
When Amber came home from class about 6 pm she said dad she would stay with mom
and I should get out for awhile. I said Debbie I will be right back and Debbie came out
of the wheelchair with her right hand and grabbed my neck. Debbie did not want me to
go and she under stands more than anyone thinks. When I got back 2 hours later
Debbie was leaned back in her chair with a wash cloth over her eye and a deep rattle
in her throat. Amber was uncomfortable with the issue and I know Amber does a good
job I would not trust anyone else to stay with Debbie. This rattle could cut off Debbie’s
air supply and Debbie would die right in front of the girls. I can put Debbie up with no
problem where the girls can’t. I laid Debbie on the black mat on her left side to drain
her saliva after 20 minutes I got Debbie back up in the wheelchair and put 3 ice cubes
in her mouth. Debbie chew them up and swallowed ½ and ½ came out the front of her
mouth. I kept patting her chest and asking her to cough. Debbie give me one big
cough and everything will be OK. Finally 20 minutes later Debbie coughed and I
caught it with the suction wand. It was three table spoons of foam in the suction
canister. Then everything was as if nothing had happen. Debbie set up for an hour
and then went to bed. Debbie looks like she will go right to sleep tonight.
I want Debbie to wake up but my mom said that may not be the best thing for Debbie.
As long as I can stay with Debbie these things will not get out of hand. Therapy say the
brain can heal some, not like before but heal if I can only keep Debbie healthy long
enough for that to happen. I would not trade today for any amount of money.

April 23, 2006
Jerrall-
This morning came too soon but for some reason I felt rested. I took my time getting
Debbie up no therapy today. I washed Debbie’s face and cleaned her peg tube site.
We stretched Debbie’s legs and got dressed before getting in bed. I was really behind
schedule and Debbie did not get breakfast until 10 am. After breakfast in the kitchen
(tube fed) Debbie leaned back in her wheelchair and rested while I gave her a facial it
took an hour. I though I had her relaxed enough to cut and file Debbie’s toe nails by
the time it was over Debbie was up set with me. So Debbie laid on the black mat with
Krystal while I grilled Krystal Sunday breakfast. Debbie is calm now we worked on mat
and stretching and then saw a movie on TV. All after noon Debbie has been jerking I
wonder why. To night when Amber came home I asked if she would help me get
Debbie in the hot tub. We were in the spa for an hour. Debbie kept pulling left hand
with her right hand while in the spa. Tonight is shower night and by 11:30 pm Debbie
is ready for sleep. All said the day was a good
day.

April 22, 2006
Jerrall-
Debbie had a couple of hours of sleep then the salvia issue woke her up. At 4 am I
changed her pants and gave her some benadryl. Debbie went back to sleep for awhile
but went again at 5 am and woke herself up. Debbie went back to sleep again but still
needed suction often. This morning we got Debbie up at 9 am she was a wake but
really tired. Amber worked with Debbie until 10 am then home health nurse came and
got a urine sample. It will be Monday before we will hear anything.
This afternoon Debbie lay on the black mat for three hours with a wash cloth over her
eyes. Before that Debbie was setting in her wheelchair and she pulled the small
blanket I had over her legs up over her head. Debbie sat like that for 10 minutes and
then I lie her down. For sure Debbie is not feeling good and she can not talk to tell me
I just have to guest. I got Debbie up about 4 pm and we are out on the screen porch
listening to the birds. Debbie is setting next to me but really jerking her right arm and
hand.
Gerald and Helen Calahan came by to visit with Debbie for about an hour. Debbie was
extra quite can would not respond to any one. When Gerald left Debbie and I lay on
the mat for a while. Later we watched a movie together to pass time. The girls are
gone tonight and it is to quite. I did not want any issues when we went to bed so we
waited until 1:30 am. Still Debbie would not go to sleep and was jerking her right so
much I could not put any braces on. At 2 am I got in bed with her and put her legs over
mine to stretch them out. It took time but worked at 3:15 am Debbie finally went to
sleep. I waited until 3:45 am to be sure Debbie stayed a sleep.

April 21, 2006
Jerrall-
Last night Debbie needed oral suction only two times. This was the best in weeks.
Debbie slept until 4 am when she went potty so much Debbie even got her shirt wet.
We laid back down but Debbie did not go to sleep when I checked her at Debbie’s
pants again at 5 am wondering if this was why Debbie would not go to sleep. Debbie
was wet again. Finally Debbie went back to sleep at 7 am and woke up at 8am.
Debbie was calm this morning and at 11 am I worked on Debbie’s mouth for a ½ hour
then her face. What was different was when we got on the mat to get dressed for
therapy. Debbie grabbed me with her right hand and pulled me to her and put her
head on my chest. It was like Debbie was afraid I have never seen her act this way.
Amber had to hold Debbie up while we changed Debbie’s shirt. Debbie was really
fighting us and that is not normal. I laid with Debbie on her side on the black mat for
over a ½ hour. Debbie relaxed and looked out the window and held my hand. When I
heard Susanne’s car I got Debbie up and transferred to the wheelchair. I was putting
Debbie’s last shoe on when Susanna came in. Susanne talked to Debbie but Debbie
only nodded once and then Susanne asked me what Debbie could be able to do best.
I told Susanne about the last hour with Debbie then I said if setting balance counts that
would make Debbie use her muscles. Wednesday Debbie sat for 45 minutes with no
help from Brian PT. So we know Debbie can do this. When Debbie sat up she was
falling over left, right, back, every where Debbie could not set up even as hard as she
was trying. After 10 minutes Debbie started bucking like a horse as Susanne has
never seen. Susanne got excited for a moment asking to check Debbie’s oxygen
level. It was 98 which is great. Debbie calmed down when I sat on the mat and rubbed
her legs but some this is wrong and Debbie can not talk to tell us. I told Susanne
about the often potting and a low odor and crystals in diaper. Susanne can I not get
Debbie tested. I smiled and explain rehab say it is a primary care issue and primary
care say they can not do it to take Debbie to ER and Debbie can not set for hours in
the wheelchair and there is real germs there. Susanne called her office and primary
care and got the ball rolling. I called Amber and asked her to go to primary care in
person and she what was up. They gave Amber a script or order to have home health
nurse come out and do a in and out calf. to get sample. Amber faxed it to home health
and they called me and said they had to have order from rehab that they could follow
primary care orders. Tonight the nurse called me and said she will be out tomorrow at
10:30 am. Susanne I wonder just how much a difference you make in peoples lives. I
just hope the pain is coming from the bladder and not Debbie’s spine, hips, or any
bigger issue. One day at a time. People ask me what I am thinking about my future
and all I can say one day at a time.
When I got Debbie up for dinner she was falling out of her wheelchair on the right
side. I had to put Debbie’s right side lateral support back on her wheelchair to correct
the issue. This is new that side support has been off for 6 months.
After Debbie had dinner and meds we went out on the screen porch. At first Debbie
keep to her self and I was setting beside her. After 20 minutes Debbie reached over
and held my arm. Then I noticed Debbie had her head turned to the left looking at her
old Tweetie bird flag. Debbie has turned her head to the left before but it has been
weeks.

April 20, 2006
Amber-

Mom and I communicated great today. She expressed a lot of her thoughts. Even if
she was not mouthing, she was able to let me know what she wanted. She had 2
saliva issues, but she felt better after 20 minutes.

Jerrall-
Debbie had a good day no therapy today every one needs a day off once and awhile.
Tonight Amber helped me cook dinner while Krystal watched TV with Debbie. We could
hear Krystal laughing from the kitchen. This is the first time I have ever asked Amber
to help but it was late really too late for dinner. I learned a lot about Amber she does
not like to touch meat or really eat meat. Debbie did not eat meat. Any way we had
stir fry vegetables, garlic mashed potatoes, fried pork chops and shrimp scampi.
Amber would put flour in 4 plates and I would put the chops on them. Then Amber put
more flour and I would turn them over. Amber peeled the potatoes but would not touch
the garlic. Amber was a huge help it cut the time in half. Thank You Amber. Krystal
and Amber ate together while I got Debbie on the mat and worked with her legs. Then
we went to the bathroom and then to bed. I fell asleep with Debbie and miss dinner
that’s ok it will be great tomorrow.

April 19, 2006
Jerrall-
Debbie had a good nights sleep. I changed her pants at 4:30 am and Debbie was
awake. I turned the flash light on my face so Debbie would know it was me and I asked
her if we could go back to sleep. Debbie nodded yes and closed her eyes. Debbie
got up at 8 am which is great. Debbie always liked Regis in the morning so Debbie
had breakfast in the living room and watched Regis and Kelly.
Brian PT came at 11 am. Debbie was resting on the mat by the front door but not
asleep.   Brian talked to Debbie and Debbie responded by looking into Brian’s eyes
instead of at the ceiling. Brian set Debbie up on the edge of the mat, the few minutes
Debbie needed prompting and then Debbie held herself up for 45 minutes all by her
self. When Brian left I let Debbie lie back down on the mat to rest. This took a lot of
energy and Debbie looks so tired and weak. I took a warm wash cloth and wiped off
Debbie’s face and placed it over Debbie’s eyes and Debbie went to sleep. It is 1 pm
and time to eat but I don not want to bother Debbie she is so calm. But by 1:30 pm
Debbie has to get up and eat because speech will be here at 2:30 pm.
Before Robin got here I ask Debbie told hold the popcycle stick in her mouth several
times and Debbie did. Also I ask Debbie what some flash cards said and Debbie
lipped rabbit slowly. The only thing Debbie could not do was stick out her tongue on
command. When Robin got here I tried not to talk and just watch. I still am having
trouble keeping food down so I had to leave the room for most of the session but when
I came back into the room Robin said Debbie did great today. Robin also know about
my problem with food. I told Robin if the team can get Debbie better I will get better.
What is wrong with me you can not see on an x ray or money can not fix lets just get
Debbie well.
The last two nights Debbie has gotten to have dinner and meds on the screen porch
out side. Tonight we watched a movie, took a shower and got off to bed. Today
was a good day Debbie was really calm.

Amber-

At 10:40 am mom and I went into the carpet room to get on the mat. I noticed her lips
were a bit dry. When a person breaths threw their mouth instead of their nose their
lips get dry and saliva tends to dry on the inner side. Well I saw a ¼” spot of dry saliva
on the inside corner of her bottom lip. I said let me get this off for you. I touched it for
one second and stopped to reach for a cloth. When I moved my finger she put her
hand up there and tried to remove it herself. She readjusted 3 times, it took 3 small
pulls right in a row and she got it. She then handed it to me to put in the cloth. I also
had tissue in my hand and she instantly got it and wiped her upper lip with it, then
handed it back to me. This was purposeful movement which the therapist say mom
has lots of. They want her to use this type of movement when they ask her in therapy.
This kind of movement is fast, smooth, and has lots of control. In therapy there is not
a true purpose to the activity so mom does not want to do it. This is a great movement
to see in person. Yeah.

April 18, 2006
Jerrall-
I thought last night was a good night until 4:30 am when Debbie woke up and thought it
was time to start the day. Instead of meds I rolled Debbie on her left side and got in
bed with her. Debbie went right back to sleep until 7 am which was more in line with
normal. Debbie has been resisting me all morning and after she went potty in her
chair now I know why. Not being able to control your muscles appears to be a very
frustrating thing. I have found not to get in a hurry and sometimes we will redo things
several times. So I laid Debbie on the mat and changed her clothes. Debbie laid so
still she took an hour nap. At least when Debbie is so calm I know she is at peace for
that moment. Amber is home now it is 12:45 pm and Debbie has to eat and be ready
for OT at 2 pm. Together we can do it even if we have to change outfits again.

Amber-
Susanne, the OT, came today at 2 pm. We all went to the table so mom could practice
painting. Susanne have mom the brush and mom opened her fingers correctly to hold
the brush. Mom tried very hard to reach out to paint the paper. It was hard because
she kept looking up at the ceiling. It was much easier for her when she looked at the
paper. I held the tray at an angle so the paper would not be flat. When they were
done she asked mom to put the brush into the water cup, and she did.

April 17, 2006
Jerrall-
Debbie went to sleep at 1:15 am and was Restless all night. Debbie had two different
saliva issues during the night while she was asleep. This caused a lot of suction
needed all through the night. At one point about 4 am I gave Debbie 20 cc benadryl
and 2 mg diazepam. After that Debbie’s mouth dried out and she went to sleep for the
rest of the night. This morning we were both were so tired that we did not get up until
10 am. Debbie did not fight me about getting dressed. Brian, PT is coming at 11am
and Debbie still has to eat. Amber did therapy with Brian and said Debbie greeted him
when he walked in.
Robin, speech came at 3 pm, Debbie was sitting in the kitchen calm and not pulling at
her shirt. Robin worked with the muscles around her mouth and when she was
finished Debbie took her own right hand and wanted to pull on her own lips. Robin did
not run with that she just made a comment. Then moved on to having Debbie pushing
her tongue out. Debbie has always had trouble with this since the injury. Three
months ago during an EEG the nurse said she counted Debbie moving her tongue in
and out 120 times a minute. This is where the worst tremor is. It is getting better it just
takes years. Then Robin showed the flash cards. Debbie could do 2 out of 3. Robin
says she does not believe Debbie is not able to read at this time. When Robin was
about to leave she told Debbie she did good with moving her tongue in and out but
could not control lip closures. Also Debbie did ok with flash cards. I do not want to up
set Robin so when she left I put the Popsicle stick near Debbie’s mouth and not to my
surprise Debbie put the stick in her mouth and closed her lip and held the stick several
times. Why and what can I do to get Debbie to work with Robin. I also asked Debbie
to stick her tongue out and Debbie would not even do with this for me. And when we
ask Debbie what does the flash card say Debbie will lip the word but when you ask
Debbie what you wear on your feet Debbie has trouble. This has always been the
problem, the ability to reason or initiate decision. I can live with this and we can learn
to work around this but it appears impossible to get therapy to work at or around this.
This was a good speech session at least Debbie was a wake and not choking. Thank
you Robin I know it has to be hard to work with TBI and even harder to work with the
husband.
Tonight when Debbie ate I put my hand on her chair and she would not hold it.

Amber-
Bryan the physical therapist came at 11 am today. Mom was very calm and he walked
in to say hello. Mom slowly started to smile and tried to mouth something. Bryan said
that is great, it looks like you are saying hi to me, thanks. They started off doing a sit
to stand transfer to the mat. He told her that he felt her give a real good push. She
sat on the standing frame harness so he could give her a better lift. She did well, she
put her right hand on his shoulder to push her upper body back so her head would be
up. Then they practiced sitting balance. Before, mom was corrected by a push on her
upper body. She made such good progress that Bryan a few weeks ago said she was
ready for the push to be only at her hips. Today he said she is needed only a light
push at the hips to correct herself. She is making good progress. At the end she laid
down and he had her push her right leg out while pushing him at the same time. Over
all this was a good and productive session.

April 16, 2006
Jerrall-
Debbie is over her cold, flu, or what ever. Last Thursday and Friday night about sun
down, 8:30 pm Debbie had a saliva issue so intense I had to lay her on her left side to
drain her throat. There was so much foam in Debbie’s mouth suctioning could not
keep up and Debbie was having trouble breathing. Oxygen does not help when the
passage way is blocked where air can not get into the lungs. Saturday and Sunday
night everything was great. This saliva issue is a Nero thing that is getting better or
not as often. This issue occurs from the brain stem injury. No one knows if it will
always be an issue but this is why I can not trust someone else to watch Debbie.
When we go to the ER the staff does not know what to expect from Debbie and they
are glad I stay at her side. What Debbie needs money can not buy. There will be a
time when our life will be more normal but right now Debbie needs me more than
anything. I would not trade this time for any amount of money. We are so lucky that
both girls are grown and make this time with Debbie possible. I do not tell you girl
enough how much a difference both of you make in Debbie’s recovery.
Last night Debbie did not want to go to sleep for no reason. Krystal, Debbie, and I
started at 10:30 pm and with extra meds it was 2:30 am before Debbie went to sleep.
This morning Debbie woke up at sunrise but I rolled her over on her left side and got in
bed with her. Debbie went back to sleep until 8:30 am. This morning was peaceful
while we were in the kitchen, I keep the back door open the air was so fresh and the
birds were singing everywhere. When Krystal got up she took Debbie out on the
screen porch while I cooked our Sunday brunch like always. Krystal said she wanted
to go to college 1 hour away instead of Charleston, SC. so she can be close to home
and able to be around more. This afternoon Krystal made me load up the jeep and
take Debbie to bed bath and beyond. I have been wanting a 3” memory foam pad to
put on Debbie’s mats. It was great to see Debbie looking at everything. When Krystal
asked Debbie to pick out a color of a towel Debbie would reach out and pick
sometimes not wanting to let go.
Tonight it is 11:30 pm and Debbie does not appear tired but therapy is tomorrow so off
to bed we go. Last night I had to start off in Debbie’s bed with all of her braces off.
Tonight Amber is here and she is not a sucker like I am so I expect Debbie to go to
sleep before to long.

April 15, 2006
Jerrall-
Last night no oral suction was needed, hope the sickness is behind us. Debbie slept 4-
5 hours but she does not appear to need much sleep these days. When Debbie was
in a coma everyone prayed for her to wake up. After that much sleep I do not want to
complain, it is great to have Debbie back with us. In time things will balance out I am
sure. Debbie has been with us all day and with extra Klonopins still a lot of excessive
jumping. Today Krystal got the pollen washed the screen in porch and Debbie’s hot
tube set up for this year. I can not wait to try it this year to see how Debbie’s muscles
respond.

April 14, 2006
Jerrall-
Best nights sleep for both of us in a long time. I woke up at day light and just laid in my
bed and watched Debbie sleep. A few minutes later Debbie woke up calm and not
jumping. I put my hand close to hers and she grabbed it and went back to sleep. A
couple more times Debbie woke up but as long as I was there she went back to sleep.
Debbie got up at 8:30 am, appeared rested and ready for the day or what ever. This
morning and last night was the first time I have ever seen Debbie take her right hand
and grab her jaw and rub it. It was like Debbie’s jaw muscles were sore or hurt. This
morning while we were in the kitchen Debbie kept looking up over her left shoulder at
the clock on the wall. This is a first; Debbie was hearing the tic tic noise and wondered
where it was coming from. PT, Bryan is coming at 11:30 so we better get dressed and
shoes on.
This afternoon after therapy I took Debbie to her friend’s house Taylor. It was great to
see Debbie looking every where at the blooming trees. I can tell it is good for Debbie
to get out for awhile.

Amber-
Today Bryan the PT came to practice sit to stand and sitting balance. Mom was tight
and seemed to fight some of the activities. She did good sitting balance in the middle
of the session. She kept throwing herself to the right side as if she wanted to lay
down. In the end we found that she needed to potty, this is why she was tight and not
cooperating. She usually does very well with Bryan, I would say sitting on her own is
her favorite. He was glad to find out why she was not herself.

April 13, 2006
Jerrall-
Last night we got Debbie to bed by 11pm but Debbie did not want to go to sleep until
11:30pm. Debbie went #1 @ 1:30 am and I was able to get things fixed with out waking
Debbie up. But @ 5:30 am Debbie went # 1 again and this time Debbie woke up.
Instead of giving Debbie meds to go back to sleep and not be alert today for therapy, I
broke my rule and rolled Debbie on her left side and laid down with her. Debbie held
on to my arm until she went back to sleep. After about an hour I could get up and
Debbie could turn on her back and stay asleep. Without meds Debbie slept until 8:30
am which is great. At 9 am Amber worked with Debbie and I could get a couple of
hours sleep.
Tonight Debbie has a rattle in her throat I can not get to with the suction wand. When
Debbie came home asleep July 03, I had a straw type suction device and when Debbie
would have a rattle in her throat I could go through her nose to clear the debris. Now
Debbie will grab and break the suction wand when I go through her mouth. So Debbie
has come a very long way. Also, this saliva does not happen often thank goodness.
Well it is time for a shower and off to bed. I know this will help with the steam and the
saliva issue.

Amber-
Mom has been calm today, but she had 3 saliva episodes. It was not her being sick,
she had the drops from the roof of her mouth. It would last for 20 minutes.
We did sitting balance on the mat and she did a great job. She is maintaining her
balance for a long time. She was very tired after the sitting. When Susanne asked
mom to shake her hand mom did. Suzanne had mom sort clothes. Mom had to take a
shirt out of the basket and put it into the basket on her right. If she pulled out a towel
she had to put in the basket on her left. Mom was told which basket was for what.
Mom was not super fast, but she knew which one to put the item in. This is fantastic.
Two times she put the shirt into the basket on her right quickly. Krystal and I put mom
on the standing frame at 6 pm. Mom did good and got to stand the full 30 minutes.
She seems tired still after doing one activity. I am so glad she does not have the
yellow 14 inch mucus anymore. She has been calm and cognitive all day. At 8 pm she
started to have her 3rd saliva issue. This one was her worst.

April 12, 2006
Jerrall-
Debbie did not want to go to sleep last night when we went to bed at midnight. Instead
Debbie went to sleep at 1:15 am. At 4:30 am Debbie was awake and her pants were
wet. It took until 5:30 am to get Debbie put back together. I know I need more sleep
so I bet Debbie needs more sleep also. I got Debbie 8 oz of formula, 2mg diazepam,
and 1 mg klonopin. Debbie went back to sleep with in 10 minutes with out her braces
on. Debbie did not have to have suction all night until now. Even with Debbie asleep
she needed her air way clear until 6 am. I almost made coffee and started my day but
my eyes are so dry and I need the sleep. So I rolled Debbie on her left side and laid
down with her. Instead of me holding Debbie’s hand, she put her hand on top of mine.
I know that Debbie feels safe because she started taking deep breaths and started
snoring. Debbie’s hand fall off mine and every muscle was relaxed. It has been 3
days since Debbie has been this calm. Debbie slept until 9 am and I could tell she had
extra meds but it is a give and take thing, she needs sleep. She is still not be drugged
into a coma state. There is a fine line and you have to be with Debbie 24/7 to know
where she is mentally at any one time.
A new thing Debbie has started everyday is when she sees me, she reaches with her
right hand and grabs me, my shirt, my ear, and my neck. Debbie is waking up more
everyday and wonders what happened. When I tell her the story several times a day,
she always reaches up and rubs her head but there is injury visible. Debbie does not
seem to understand.
NOTE: This morning Debbie and I spent over an hour cleaning her mouth and
scraping her tongue. Debbie was setting in the kitchen looking out the west window.
We take breaks often because no one can keep there mouth open that long. During
the breaks I noticed Debbie looking out the window like always but today Debbie’s left
eye was not following her right eye. Over the last month I have noticed Debbie has not
been moving her left side. This morning I noticed Debbie’s teeth on her right side are
starting to lean in to the center of her mouth. In 3 weeks Debbie has all of her doctors
check ups. I need to ask if Debbie should start wearing an eye patch on her right eye
to make her left eye stronger. After 4/4/03 Debbie did not open her left eye for two
months and then did not close left eye for two months. At that time her vision was
checked and the optic nerve was working. But the last 3 weeks it looks like Debbie is
going blind in her left eye. Debbie has never had a stroke but her left side looks like
something is going on.
Robin, speech will be here in ½ hour so I need to get Debbie dressed. Time goes so
fast because there is always something that needs done. I am glade Debbie is so
patient with me. Debbie worked with Robin today for the first time in 3 weeks. If
Debbie does not start working with speech she will not be reserted the middle of May.
Speech takes so much energy and effort for Debbie, on speech days I wish Debbie did
not have any other therapy. After Robin left I laid Debbie down on the mat and she did
not move at all. Maybe even took a nap. When I put a dry wash cloth over Debbie’s
eyes and limit the visual input Debbie is able to take a brake.

April 11, 2006
Jerrall-
Debbie had a good night sleep even though she had increased tone. Just before bed
she got to use the bathroom and take a shower. This made a big difference. Also
when I got Debbie ready for bed I saw what was the problem, it was the start of a
hemorrhoid. Debbie has a special gel cushion in her wheelchair but after setting for
three years Debbie has done great. Pain causes Debbie to draw up her muscles. The
doctor gave Debbie some special cream it will help. This morning Debbie was tight so I
laid in bed with her for almost an hour. I could tell it helped but it did not make the pain
totally go away. Debbie was better than yesterday but it is still not right. Today when I
transfer Debbie she puts her right arm around me and almost breaks my neck. This is
new.

Amber-
Mom was tight when she woke up this morning. As the day went on she started to
relax. We practiced sitting on the mat and she did a great job. It seemed like it was
not a big deal to her. Later on we went out side to sit on the screened in porch. This
was our first time out there since the weather has warmed up. She did have one
episode with her saliva today, but it only lasted 20 minutes. I suctioned her 2 times
and the rest of the 20 minutes she felt bad, but the saliva was not running. I put a
warm wash cloth on her eyes and she felt better.

April 10, 2006
Jerrall-
Debbie did well through the night, no oral suction needed. At 6 am I asked Amber to
change beds. I just needed a couple of hours of sleep without having to listen with one
ear. At 8:30 am I went back to Debbie’s bedroom to get her up in the wheelchair.
Something is not right with Debbie this morning. She has excessive tone and her head
is pulling to the left while her back is arched 2” off the back of the wheelchair. I only
left Debbie with Amber for 2 ½ hours, I do not know if Debbie woke up, I was not there.
Amber had put Debbie’s jacket and pants on before I got there, did Debbie rolled over
and pulled a muscle or what. All I know is that you can not rush Debbie early in the
morning and once she starts to resist you this will set the mode for the whole day.
PT, Bryan came at 11 am and said Debbie was for sure getting stronger in her right
leg. Also Debbie’s sitting balance is getting stronger. Debbie does best with the PT to
the point Debbie can not hold her self up. I wonder if on PT days, if we should make
that the only therapy on that day.
OT, Susanne came right after PT actual they passed each other in the drive way.
Debbie did not appear to want to do anymore therapy. Susanne took Debbie into the
dinning room to work at the table except Debbie just wanted to stare at the ceiling as if
we were not there or as if we would go away. Debbie could not control her muscles to
even hold a cup. This is not a good or bad thing it is just the way it is some days.
Susanne commented how wild Debbie was on Friday and a lot of jerking with her right
hand.
Debbie got 1 ½ hours of rest and lunch before speech, Robin got here. By now
Debbie is so tight I could not feed her in the chair. Debbie had to lie on the mat and
only get half of her lunch. Half way through speech Debbie closed her right eye and
shut down. Debbie slept in her chair for 1 ½ hours but the tone is getting worse and
her body is cold everywhere. I wrapped Debbie in a blanket and laid down with her.
Debbie warms up but is still tight. At 5 pm I gave Debbie 2mg diazepam and ½ mg
Klonopin. Debbie relaxes some but something is still not right.
After the shower and using the bathroom # 2 Debbie calmed down just before bed.
This bathroom thing must of hurt most of the day.

Amber-
The physical therapist, Bryan said to mom “your sitting balance is sure improving”. I
was so happy to hear him say this. That means he realizes how strong mom is
getting. People seem to over look how much she is improving. They think if she can
not do the new stuff then she can not do anything. That is not true. She can now do
sit to stand, close her left eye when you put drops in, hold her head up in sit to stand,
her cough is much stronger, pull herself forward holding someone’s hand in the chair,
smile, shake hands, do a standing frame instead of a tilt table, whisper from time to
time, have expressions, reach out, shake her head no, hold her head up, and sit for a
while and hold her right arm out – this used to be unheard of. This all used to be
thought as impossible to relearn, but mom has. I remember the first time the therapist
left, they said she has to be able to put her right arm out and keep her right foot down
in sitting. Well a year or so later she did it and we now have therapy back. Mom
needs time and people who believe in the impossible. There is nothing she can not
learn with time. She is breaking all odds and doing great. The sickness she had was
tough and now she is getting better. She gets tired fast but her back muscles are still
strong. She is a fighter and will never give up. I am proud of you mom. I wish we had
as much stamina as you. I love you and miss you so much.

April 9, 2006
Jerrall-
Pneumonia, flu, cold what ever it was is gone. Debbie went to bed at 1:30 am and did
not cough or need suction. I waited until 4 am before I went to sleep. Debbie was
awake as the sun came in the window around 7:30 am. Debbie was calm and waiting
on me to get up. Since 4 am was not long ago I turned Debbie on her left side and got
in bed with her. It was a good feeling holding her but I could get a little more needed
sleep. When we got up we went into the kitchen to start our day. Debbie keeps
holding her head down as if she wants out of the chair. After her meds and formula, I
was able to lean Debbie back and spent an hour cleaning her mouth. It looked great,
better than normal. Debbie’s tongue looked just like mine. Since it is Sunday and
there is not much to do, I went ahead and trimmed Debbie’s finger nails. By now
Debbie is very upset with me but all of this has to be done. When I asked if she would
to take her glasses off, she whispered why and jerked them off and threw them in the
floor. Debbie is very on cognitively this morning.
Amber got home 5 pm so I could lie down for awhile. Amber and her friend got Debbie
standing and did other therapies. At 8 pm when I got up I asked Debbie how she was
doing and she turned her head to the left and asked me “what” in a loud whisper.
Tonight we watched big daddy the movie, she was really into the TV. I walked up and
gave Debbie a pen and paper and said write your name. To my surprise Debbie held
the pen and started to write. When Debbie had trouble trying to write she took the pen
and pointed at the TV like let me watch the movie.
It is so good that Debbie is no longer sick. Sometime you do not know how good it can
be until you see worse. Tonight I even made myself a huge salad. I have not done
this since Debbie and I would eat dinner together. Getting over this cold is like the top
of the hill and Debbie is starting go back down the other side. I know there will be
other set backs but this is a huge hurtle to over come.
I have felt sick, sad, just not myself for 2 or 3 weeks. Tonight after getting up I felt
rested and more like myself. I wonder if Debbie is having the same feelings. Hope so,
next week starts tomorrow. Today has been a day of appreciation.

Amber-
At 5:45 pm Yusime and I put mom on to the standing frame. She did very well. Her
legs were straight and strong as we went up. Her legs tend to bend and turn out as we
go up sometimes. She has not stood in 7 days, due to the cold, and her performance
tonight was not typical for standing to be prolonged that many days. Her muscles
seem to be getting stronger and able to maintain their strength even when she does
not have active therapy for a few days. This is a huge gain. She used to have to start
all over after one day in bed. I can see a tremendous difference in her. While she was
on the standing frame she put several rings on the cup holder. If she could not get the
ring in the correct position she would reposition the ring before trying again. It was so
great to see her working hard. She has not put rings on the holder while on the
standing frame in a very long time. Before we got onto the frame, Yusime said hi to
mom and she looked down and to the left to acknowledge him. It is more difficult for
her to turn to the left. She did this smoothly, without any hesitation. After we got down
from the standing from the phone rang. It was Krystal. I asked mom is she wanted to
talk to her; she GRABBED the phone out of my hand and put it to her ear. She was
persistent on having the phone. It was hard to get her off the phone. When it was
time to say good bye, I showed mom how to turn it off, she tried to. She took her index
finger to point to the button to turn it off. She missed a bit, but it was wonderful.

April 8, 2006
Jerrall-
Debbie stayed a sleep all night and until 3 pm. Her cough and suctions have gotten a
lot better. Now it appears we are back in a Nero Mode. Debbie got up at 10 am.    Not
that she wanted too but we do not want to mix up day and night.

April 7, 2006
Jerrall-
Debbie is still ok. I have heard of limits but until you are pushed that far no one is ever
sure. Well today is my limit another night of suction every 15 minutes or so. Debbie
did not wake up but want quality of sleep can that be. I went and go amber at 5 am the
earliest yet. She was not a happy camper but I am at a point I can not focus my eyes.
I slept in her bed until noon which is another first. When I got up Debbie and Amber
were in the den. Every thing looked ok so amber told me to get out of the house for a
while and get some thing to eat. Went I called in around 1 pm Amber said Debbie was
a sleep in her wheelchair and she had to cancel speech for today.   Between 1 pm and
3pm Debbie woke up. Debbie was so wild and started controlling her muscles. Krystal
and Debbie rolled a ball back and forth 20 times among other things. Debbie was
trying to talk. Susanne came and Debbie was awake then and able to do therapy. The
session went OK. Earlier today Debbie was sticking her tongue out and able to follow
commands. So when I got home Amber was on the mat and Debbie was in her chair
every thing appeared normal. So I laid down trying to catch up on my sleep. When I
woke up at 8:30 pm every one was a sleep. Debbie was sitting in her wheelchair,
Amber on the mat beside Debbie, and Krystal in her room.   I think everyone has
reached there limit.
Amber and Krystal went and got take out and the three of us sat at the table together
and ate. This is a first in years. It is strange on a Friday night we are all together
trying to make the best of this. Just the three of us take care of Debbie and the more
Debbie wakes up (cognitively) the harder it is.
At 10: 30 pm Amber and I got Debbie to bed she stayed a sleep. This girl must be
realty tired.

Amber-
At 2 pm Krystal and mom practiced sticking her tongue out. Krystal used the
toothbrush as an incentive. She asked mom to stick her tough out so she could clean
it. Mom stuck her tongue out as far as it could go. She did this a number of times.
They put the big sitting ball in mom’s lap. Krystal would push the pall to mom and have
her push it back. Mom did this about 20 times, then she shook her head no to say
stop. They were smiling so much, it was great.

April 6, 2006
Jerrall-
Debbie woke up about 8 am this morning. Last night Debbie was coughing every 15
minutes and needed suction. I do not think I woke Debbie up each time. This morning
Debbie seems very tired, but she is up in her chair. 10 am Debbie is up in her chair
with her neck turned to the right and her right hand has a lot of movement.
Today has been unusual. There has been no therapy today, just a day of rest.
Debbie has only coughed a couple of times today. No naps but a lot of rest time. It is
8 pm I think Debbie and I will get on the mat and work on her legs. I hate to move her,
she is so calm.

Amber-
Mom was calm and relaxed today. At 2:30 pm her and I practiced with celery, flash
cards, lip closure, and swallowing. She did a good job. She became tired fast. We
can usually to cards for a few minutes, today we did about 5 cards. At 4:30 pm dad
woke up from a much needed nap and came in the room to say hi to mom. She was
lying down and when he leaned over she smiled. He said I love you. She continued to
smile and reached out to touch his shoulder. It was great to see. She was so happy
and so was dad. During our stretches, mom helped with her left arm much more than
usual. I think her left arm is beginning to work again. It is 9 pm mom is beginning to
have those hard dry coughs again.

April 5, 2006
Jerrall-
Debbie is OK every body. She still need suction to clear her way but it is clear. Before
Friday 3/24/06,Debbie’s base oxygen was 98 or 99. Now 95 to 93 is the best it gets.
Sally, Barbara, or Joan we tried to come to the meeting last night, I even had the Jeep
loaded, but Debbie’s breathing still is not ready to be out in the pollen.
This journal is about Debbie’s recovery but I have lost several days due to sleep
desperation. I could tell the PT, Bryan, what year it is but I have no ideal what day of
the week it is or want the date is. At this point all I know is that Debbie is chocking and
needs me. Twice yesterday I had to blow in her mouth to clear mucus plugs. Tonight,
laying on the mat letting gravity drain Debbie’s throat I put the suction wand near her
and she grabbed it and put it in her own mouth. Debbie is a ware of what is going on
but that does not make her left side any less paralyzed. I did not ask for help until Oct.
05 and I am still waiting. Always they were ready for an intuition but that is not the
answer. They say with suction and feeding tube being at home is out of the question.
For 3 years some how we have made it work. Debbie has made progress until this
cold. I have held Debbie in my arms choking and her face turning colors. But together
we will get though this and will have 1 more thing behind us. This cold has strengthen
Debbie’s chest muscles and made Debbie more a wear and stronger all over. In the
last week I have seen Debbie try to get out of the wheelchair and off that mat in the
den. It is like Debbie does not realize her left is not working at this time. Though all of
this, Debbie has kept her days and nights right and a great attitude.

April 4, 2006
Jerrall-
Well today is here. We can not change anything, but we can make the best of it as
much as possible. Debbie has had a good day. She got up later, this was a deserved
and need rest. OT and PT were just ok, you can tell Debbie is realty tired. From 3 am
until 8 am Debbie stayed in the low 90’s with oxygen. Debbie’s color is great and she
just needs time to get over this cold.
When Debbie woke up this morning she was calm and not jumping. She even let me
get in her bed for a ½ hour. Debbie is so warm in the mornings. This morning we were
so late. I went ahead and took the time to put a pant suit outfit on with a jacket, so
Debbie would be ready for therapy. Bryan worked on setting balance. I think he
thought Debbie was not on very much. Debbie was doing ok but that is hard to
interrupt in 15 minutes.
This gave me and Bryan time to talk. I wanted to know what type of gym or muscle
building equipment that would help Debbie. Also asked if a peddle machine would
help. Bryan first response was let’s wait and see. If I had waited for three years where
would Debbie be? Also, I wanted to talk to PT and OT about out patient therapy. Also
some changes will be made but Susanna asked me to wait a week before making any
changes. So the next three days will be interesting.
Well it is shower night so we had better get started. Debbie is extra calm.
THIS IS A QUOTE I WANT TO SHARE:
Yesterday is history.
Tomorrow a mystery.
Today is a gift. That’s why it is called the present!!!

April 3, 2006
Jerrall-
Debbie did not sleep vary long last night. Debbie is still battling with this cold. Debbie’s
oxygen level down to 92 % by 6 am. Debbie has had a calm day. Debbie was still a
sleep when PT was to come. So Bryan rescheduled.

Amber-
At 3 am dad and I were helping mom with her throat. She was not asleep, but relaxed.
When dad leaned over the side of the bed, mom gave him a huge smile. I was on the
other side. Dad said are you smiling at me, mom continued to hold the smile. Her
throat must have hurt, but she was happy we were there. At 5 am dad and I switched
places. I laid down with mom. She coughed every 5 minutes. Most of the time it was a
dry cough. She stayed asleep the entire time. At 7 am she woke up because she
went potty. When I leaned over the side of the bed, she smiled at me. I felt very
special. She is great. After that she fell back to sleep. Her cough seems to be less,
every 10 minutes instead. I was coughing to. I have a dry cough, but for some reason
I could not stop coughing. Sometimes I would just hold her arm and tell her to relax
and she did. If she relaxes when she is coughing, her face does not get all red. She
usually gets scared and it makes the cough worse. She did great when we practiced
sit to stand today. It was just her and I going up and down. She held my back tight
and kept her head high. Her sitting balance was strong. I thought her back muscles
would have gotten weak from going without therapy while she was sick. Her muscles
used to weaken after one day in bed. I know she has come so far. She sat up straight
like it was not a big deal. At 8 pm I put drops in her left eye and she closed the lid
before I put them in. Wow. 6 months ago the doctor wanted to sew her eye lid shut,
since she did not blink it. Here we are today and she can close it much more often.
She can not close it enough to keep it lubricated on her own yet, but enough to keep
away from surgery. I put chap stick on her lips and asked her to rub them together.
She did!!!. Yes she did, smack, her lips were touching and she tried to go back and
forth. She then rubbed them with her finger, she is cheating. It is cute to see her use
other ways to make things work.
11:20 pm, she is in bed now. She is not asleep and her cough is not dry. I hope she
can start to feel better soon.

April 2, 2006
Amber-
Today some of our family came over to the house. Our friend Erin has 2 little girls, 1
and 2 years old. Mom enjoyed watching them play. Mom kissed Riley, the 1 year old,
on the head 4 different times. One time mom even held her.    When she wiggled
about mom adjusted her hand to hold Riley in the correct spot. It was just like when
Lilly was a few months old. Mom held onto her very well.

April 1, 2006
Amber-
It is April already, where has the time gone? 3 more days until the 3 year anniversary
of mom and Krystal’s wreck. I find my self remembering that day many times through
out the week, every week. It may get me down a bit, but I feel some comfort in being
able to remember each step. It reminds me of how far we have come. Some days are
so hard and you need something to remind you how much better things are even if
they are still difficult. I find it interesting which memories in life we chose to remember
to help us shape our lives. Even bad memories can help boost our moral. Sometimes
you just need a push to keep you going. I feel like I will forget how mom’s voice
sounded, how she used to yell my full name if she needed something off of the top self
(she is 5’ and does not like needed help to reach things), the sound of her feet on the
hollow bricks at our old house, how she never stopped smiling, her laugh, or how
happy she made everyone. The thought of that day when I saw mom’s car smashed
and the shock of how Krystal and her survived, makes me know how close we are to
recovery. This may sound odd, but there was no way mom could have survived. Well
she did so there is a reason. She is going to walk, talk, and eat in some form or
fashion one day. Each day she is closer. Krystal had bruises and a torn sternum, but
really she received a scar that no one can ever remove. She was so strong to be
there for mom. She was the first person to comfort her and stayed so strong. I arrived
on the seen and started to scream as I was crying so loud. Krystal helped me get a
hold of myself. There were cops and emergency people asking me questions and I
was just yelling, where is my mom, what happened, is she ok, why are you flying her,
help me. I needed mom’s purse to have her personal information like her bank books,
licenses, any other ID’s. The cops needed this information and so did I to keep people
from steeling her stuff. I had to go inside the car to find her purse. I remember seeing
all of the blood, smashed seats that Krystal and mom sat in, the door cut off, broken
glass, steel bend like it was nothing, and more things that almost made me though up.
I asked the man who took me to the car more about mom. I said, you do not fly
someone to a hospital unless they are about to die. Why are you flying my mom? I
was so mad. How could mom be hurt that bad? If you saw the car you would say she
was not alive, but I just could not believe my mom could ever be that hurt. This
happens to other people not you, you say to yourself. I was demanding to know more.
Krystal and I then drove to the hospital. How did we get there I was hysterical?
Mom was calm all day. She did not cough as much today. When she did cough it was
hard, dry, and turned her fast red still. We did a short speech session that went well.
When we went threw the flash cards, she mouthed them very well. I could clearly see
what word she would mouthing. She put her lips together well, formed her lips perfect,
and used her tongue appropriately. Anyone else would have been able to understand
her. I was so proud of her. It is 6:40 pm and mom is beginning to cough again. The
cough sounds so bad. I wish we could take it away for her.